Once again I have set a new goal and am on another journey. This time I am sticking with it! I hope...

Once again my mind has said "Nikki, get off your lazy ass and get going."  I wish my mind and body would both cooperate with each other.  I had some medical issues for a few months.  Nothing too major, it is better now.  Over that time I realized that what I was putting into my body and how I was just sitting on my couch was affecting the way I lived and felt.  

This week, after feeling that post holiday bloating feeling, I decided that it is officially time to change.   When I met with my Dr. a couple of weeks ago we talked about some healthy eating habits.  She hates the word "diet" and refuses to use it.  She instead uses the phrase "healthy eating".  Same thing just doesn't sound as horrible as "diet".  When I met with her she gave me a few tips that I have been trying to follow.  One of them was to try and eat one fruit of vegetable from every color of the rainbow each day.  Sounds hard right?  NOT.  I started this week with this.  I went to the grocery store and loaded up on colorful fruits and vegetables.  I took a risk and bought a sweet potato.  I have never cooked my own sweet potato, but I have had sweet potato fries and thoroughly enjoyed them.  When I was younger I never liked sweet potatoes, so I have just stayed away from them unless they were fried.  So on Tuesday I chopped up my sweet potato into cubes, lined a baking sheet with tin foil ( I always use tin foil on my baking sheets.... easier to clean :)), drizzled a little olive over them, sprinkled with salt and pepper, and placed it into a 375* oven for 30 minutes (flipping them over about half way through).  Once they came out of the oven I put about a teaspoon of butter over them while they were still warm.  OMG!!! THEY WERE DELICIOUS AND IT MADE A TON!  They were delicious and I had some left over to bring for my lunch today.  I have to admit it, I have been converted! I love potatoes, but know how there is not too much nutrition in them.  I mean they are not horrible, but there are better options.  Next I want to try to mash them! Everyone says I make the best mashed potatoes, let's see if they have the same reaction when I make sweet potatoes. 

OK, now I went off on a little sweet potato tangent there.  Sorry... we all need a little sweetness in our life though right?  What I really wanted to talk about in this blog is my new goal/challenge.  Running a 5K.  Yes, my fat ass did just say "RUNNING".  I've always kind of wanted to run, and I have seen so many people doing these couch to 5K's, and I know that interval work outs are great for weight loss.  I have done two days of the workout so far.  The first day I was at my parents' house, so I used their treadmill.  I was so impressed with myself.  I did the whole workout without cutting anytime off, and I was still able to hop on the elliptical for 20 minutes when I was done!  The second workout I did yesterday.  Since I don't have a treadmill at my house, I went outside.  HOLY CRAP!  I don't know what it was yesterday, but I had to cut back on my running time.  I don't know if it was the difference between running outside or running inside, but man was I dying.  I didn't quit, I just altered.  Instead of do intervals of walking 90 seconds and running for a minute, I did intervals of walking for 2 minutes and running for 30 seconds.  Doing that I finished the workout and so pumped to be done with day two and still be able to walk today!! Tomorrow will be day 3, and that is usually the hardest.  I will let you know how it goes!

Day One= Success.... Kind of....

Day one to me is always the hardest.  It is putting to action what your mind has been saying you should do. Yesterday I thought went.... OK.  I took my dog for a 45 minute walk, and considering the fact that I haven't really worked out much in almost a year, I was pretty pleased with that.  It felt great getting out there and walking, as well as, knowing that I am still in some sort of shape.  Yes, you can still be a fatty and be in shape... You're just round! LOL

So I worked out, and I don't really remember sitting on the couch watching much TV at all! I think I only watched about an hour, which is a huge feat for me.  The food choices were not so great, although I did use a little better portion control.  Currently I am unable to use my kitchen sink, and my bathroom because of  a plumbing problem.  So I was not going to make a big fuss over dinner last night.  I threw in a frozen pizza.  Bad I know, but where as I would normally eat almost the whole pizza, I only ate two pieces.  To my surprise I was satisfied.  I wasn't stuffed, but I didn't go to bed hungry either.  I think the key to my success will be finding the balance to feeling satisfied and feeling stuffed. 

I forgot my lunch for work today.  I was going to make a salad, so instead of going out and getting Mc Donalds or Burger King like I used to (although they both sound amazing right now as I am hearing my tummy growl) I think I am going to hit up Subway for a nice refreshing sub! Tonight I am going to try and pull a double workout.  When I get home I am going to once again start my Biggest Loser workout DVD and later take Reezy for a walk.  Let me tell you that DVD is amazing.  You don't feel it while you are working out, but the next day you won't be able to walk! I love that feeling! Even though it hurts like hell, it is a good hurt.  A hurt that you know you are doing something right for yourself! I am also going to go join the gym tonight and hopefully either Wednesday or Thursday I can start my swimming workouts at 5:30 A.M.  I still think I am nuts but we will see how it goes!

Name Change

I decided to change the name of my blog.  Although I really loved the previous title, Fashionable Fatty is more me! I am a fashion loving fatty with the hopes of losing weight and becoming more and more fashionable.  Stay tuned for my fashion and weight loss tips!!!

Your's Truly
~Fashionable Fatty~

Third Times a Charm?

Well once again, it has been about 9 months since I have blogged.  I guess I haven't gotten the hang of this blogging thing yet.  Maybe the third time will be the charm.  I also haven't been having success in living my best life. But maybe the third time is the charm for that too. 

Like last this year, this year has been full of surprises and wonderful things.  My brother and his wife welcomed thier first child in May and bought their first home in September. Noah Salvatore has been the greatest blessing our family could ever ask for.  He is the sweetest little baby and of course I love him to pieces.  I could go on about Noah all day, but I will save you from a massive blog entry. My brother's house is amazing!  While my older brother is getting adapted to the family life and being a homeowner, my little brother is getting to know what the city life, and wedding planning life is like.  While on vacation to Puerto Rico this summer my younger brother proposed to his girlfriend of nearly five years.  Brooke has been such an awesome addition to our family, and really I couldn't imagine our family without her.  Even before he proposed, I always knew that she would be not only one of my best friends, but my sister.  My mom and dad are finally completely empty-nesters, and I think they are enjoying the time they have with just the two of them.

 As for me, I have turned 25 ( a quater of a century), and I am not going to lie, it has kind of creeped me out being this old.  I don't know what I will be like when I turn 30.  I have gotten a dog! Reezy Fred (yes, after Ryan Lochte and Michael Fred Phelps hehe) has been the best dog I could ever ask for.  I picked him up from the humaine society in March and our bond gets closer and closer each day.  My career has brought me to a new town, new job, new home, and new adventure in life. I am teaching 6th grade at a Catholic school, and living in an apartment above my brother's garage.  Sounds glamorous right?  Well, the apartment is pretty amazing and I am really enjoying my job, and living 10 feet from my nephew.  

I have not been living my best life, and it has been showing.  Today I woke up and said to myself that today is the day that my life is going to change forever.  The cookie dough is out of the freezer, the chips have been thrown from the cupboard, and the mac and cheese has been given to my sister-in-law! It's beyond time to change my life around.  I want to be here to see every part of my nephew's life.  I want to take him to the park and play basketball with him.  I want to meet the man of my dreams and start my own family.  How am I supposed to find a man that is happy with me if I am not happy with myself.  Being happy with myself starts with being healthy.  And that journey to a healthy, happy life starts now!

 I have been in deliberation about joining the gym in town.  I have an eliptical and my family's clinic has a gym within the clinic, but I want to start swimming in the mornings.  The gym membership just seems so much, and with all of my bills and my trip to Olympic Trials this summer, I am wondering if I can afford the $60 a month to join.  I have been thinking about it for a while. My thought process has brought me to this conclusion... $60 a month is nothing compared to the importance of my health and hapiness.  So.... looks like I will be waking myself up at 5:30 every morning and hitting the pool!  Am I crazy?? YES, but hopefully the crazy will pay off and in the end I will be happier than ever!! I'll let you know how it goes waking up at 5:30. I am totally not a morning person and 6:30 has been bad enough, but 5:30... YIKES!!! I will just keep telling myself it will be worth it in the end, and being tired will be nothing compared to the way I am goign to feel when I am thinner! So here is to a new chapter in my life and a new journey that WILL work this time!

Am I living my best life?

Wow I cannot remember the last time I posted a blog. So much has happened this year and it has made me sit back and think about my life and what I want out of it. I came to the conclusion that I want more out of life than what I am getting now. I have a great life don't get me wrong. I have loved everything that has happened in my life and wouldn't change it for the world, but I still want more.

This past year my brother has met the woman of his dreams, gotten married, and now is going to be a father. I look at how quickly his life has changed, and honestly I am a little jealous of him. I want to meet the man of my dreams, fall in love, and start a family. Those of you who know me well know that, that is something I have always wanted. Don't get me wrong. I am so happy for him and I love his wife to death. It feels like she has always been a part of our family, and they are completely happy together. I just wish that I had that. In the back of my mind I think to myself "who is going to fall in love with you looking like the way you do?" OK I know, I know, that is not true, but that's how I feel sometimes. But I also think me thinking that in part motivates me. It motivates me to live my best life. It makes me sit back and think... "am I living my best life?" Let me answer that.... NO I'M NOT. That is why it is time to change the way I live. So you are all my witnesses to my vow to live my best life.

This morning I woke up feeling tired, bloated, and just plain GROSS. (I have been feeling that way for a while now) I know why it is I have been feeling this way. I haven't been working out, I haven't been eating right, and I haven't been taking care of ME! Well it's time I took care of me. I know I can do it. I have done it before, but I fell off the deep end. This morning I dug myself out of that hole, crawled out of bed, and got on the elliptical. I had forgotten how much I really do enjoy working out and how much better I feel when I do. I have so much more energy and I just feel so much better about myself. It was an hour out of my day. AN HOUR. An hour that made me feel SO much better. So why am I being so lazy? Why am I not living my best life? Why am I not working out? Honestly I don't know. So why not do something about it. Well I think I just might. Today I felt so great after getting off the elliptical. It's time. It's actually beyond time. I am excited to get back into the swing of things and have some sort of routine in my life. I feel so much better and in the end I will be so much happier. From now on I am going to try and update this blog with tips and take you on my journey to my best life!

FAIL

OK so my first goal is probably not going to be met :( I have been great about working out at least 5 times a week, but the food is still an issue. First off I have found a new love of coffee and Starbucks... OK so I always loved Starbucks, but I always got tea not coffee. Well, thanks to my co-worked John I am now addicted to coffee and Starbucks. Of course, I always have to get the whipped cream and who gets a skinny drink? I mean really who likes skim milk. I am still experimenting with coffee... I don't want milk flavored water in there! LOL I have lost about 10lbs and I think I am gaining muscle, but it is not the result that I have wanted so far because I feel I have partially failed. I got the workout stuff down, but the diet.... NOT SO MUCH. I also have not been taking my medication like I should, which affects my metabolism. I think it is just really hard right now with work and school and living with my cousin. I feel like I am constantly eating out of a bag or a box (box being lean cuisines or whatever I find in the freezer section in Target and bag being whatever I decide to grab for lunch as I am running between class workout and work) and that is not healthy. Once I move in with my brother I feel the diet part will get a lot easier. I will be able to go grocery shopping for my own stuff and NOT eat out of a box or bag. Also once I move in with my brother in end of February I am going to go on a no dairy diet. Over the past year or two I have some weird reaction to milk that makes me ears hurt like a bitch... Wait that means no Starbucks :( :( Well I can treat myself every once in a while or get soy!! HAHA But anyways I think starting that way will be a great help to me. I also need to get a membership to the gym once I move in with my brother. I think I am going to start swimming once I move there. Here I don't have a membership to the Y and I wish I did so I could use swimming as a cool down to my workout. I do have a membership to a gym but it doesn't have a pool :(

Goals, Goals, Goals!!!

As I stated in my last blog, I am not making new years resolutions this year. Instead I am setting goals! I know I said that my goals were going to stay on the inside, but I think it is time let them out! I am setting goals for myself. I have silly goals like keeping my nails manicured at all times, wearing my glasses more so I can get contacts before my trip to California, and getting my first tattoo. But I also have serious goals. A goal to lose at least 20lbs before my birthday, shop less and save more, and my ultimate goal of losing 80lbs before California. In order to get to that ultimate goal I am going to set smaller goals as milestones to get to that goal. My dad has always taught us that setting goals are important in life, but meeting those goals is even more important. "You miss 100% of shots you don't take", well you also don't meet 100% of goals you don't set. I set my goals high and hope to reach them. As Michael Fred would say "The more you dream the further you get!" (did you really think i was going to make it through a blog without mentioning a swimmer?? HA that wont happen!) So I am going to set my goals high, but I am also going to reach my goals. If I reach my goals I will give myself a reward, if not, there will be consequences. It is time to get back into. I felt so much better last year when I was working out every day. I not only felt better physically, but I also felt better about myself. It is time to get off my ass and get on the eliptical!! Set my goals high and reach those goals!!!!

2010? Already?

Wow, is it really 2010 already? Seriously where does the time go? In this post I thought about reflecting on the past 10 years of my life, but then I remembered that in 2000 I was an eighth grader. I would have to reflect on all my Jr. High, High School, and most of my College years. That would take way too much time and would probably bore you, so instead I am going to focus on the last year of the decade, which I think had to be the best.

As they say in like a Lamb out like a Lion. OK so I know that is what they say about March, but I feel that the saying goes true for this past decade/even year... ok well maybe not year because 2009 came in with quite a bang in my book! As I reflect over the last year, there are so many things I have to reflect on. For starters, the wonderful new friends that I have formed. I never thought that spending so much time on Facebook could lead to me finding friends that I feel will last a lifetime. Who would have thought that my admiration for Michael Phelps would grow to what some people would call an "obsession" of swimming. I call more of a die hard fan! You can't tell me that their aren't men out there that act the same way about a football or basketball team as I do about USMOST. I honestly cannot tell you how I got into the sport, but I can tell you that I have enjoyed the sport so much and have made some amazing friends. My trip to Indianapolis has topped the list of trips I have take over the past decade. Sure it wasn't a trip to Hawaii with my family (which is also on the top of my list so don't feel bad mom and dad), and it wasn't going on a cruise to tropical islands. It was to a town in the Midwest with a bunch of fangirls. It was meeting people that you have seen on TV during the Olympics so many times and wished you had their determination, their will power, their drive for something they want so bad they can taste it. It was unbelievable and I will NEVER forget it!

For me this past year has topped them all. Each year I feel my life gets better and better. Sure there are always bumps in the road, but that makes us who we are as individuals. One bump that has been in my road my entire life, is the bump I would like to call my weight. This past year I have tried to hurdle over that bump. I succeeded, but only part way. Before I left for Indianapolis, I was determined that I was not going to look the way I did when I got my tickets and decided to go. I knew that I needed to change the way I live. I put my mind to it and no one could stop me. I lost so much weight and I was so happy with myself, but since then I have been stuck on a road block. I make the same resolution every year to lose weight and get in shape, but last year I don't ever remember making that resolution. Last year I threw resolutions out the window along with 50lbs. Maybe that was my secret, to not make it my new years resolution. So this year I am not making it my new years resolution. I am just going to do it because I want to do it. I want to be healthy. I want to shop at more than 2 stores at the mall. I want to not be afraid to do things because of my weight. In 2009 I accomplished that. I remember the first time I went into American Eagle and tried on a shirt just for fun. It fit. I was so excited and thrilled with myself that I could finally buy something from American Eagle. But that is not enough. This year I am striving to go from wearing American Eagle to being able to fit into the dinky clothes at Holister and Abercombie! I will make it happen. Even if it is to just prove to everyone that I can and will do it. I have goals for myself. Not resolutions, but goals. By a certain time I want to lose a certain amount. Those goals as Michael Fred would say "they will stay on the inside", but I know those goals, and I know that they are reachable. Deep down inside I am an extremely competitive person. My mom has said that her and my dad want to shed a few lbs this year. Why not make it a little friendly competition!

This has gotten way too long so I am signing off for now! I think I am going to use this as my workout and weight loss journal so stay tuned for further entries! I am ready and I am motivated. 2010 is going to be the best year yet! Happy New!!!

Has been way too long!

It has been way too long since I have posted a new blog! I know I said I wanted to do this on a daily if not weekly basis... well I think the last time I blogged was in February. :s So much has happened since then.

Why don't I start with my biggest accomplishment and what I am most proud of to catch everyone up. I started this blog as a way to help motivate myself to lose weight. Well this kind of took a backseat as a motivator, but something must have stayed with me to motivate me, because since I last posted I have lost over 50 lbs. I made a goal for myself and told myself that I had to lose that 50lbs by a certain time (my trip to Indy which will be mentioned in the next paragraph!). I was 2lbs away from my goal before my trip!!! I was pretty proud of myself, but now I have a new goal and a new time frame!! I am determined to make myself a healthier person! After our family vacation I lost motivation, but it is back!! It is amazing what a few lbs can do for ones self esteem and motivation!! It is back on in full force!

Now on to the best part of my life since my last post!!! INDY!!! I cannot say enough how awesome that week was! It was beyond the best week of my life! I never thought I would be into the sport of swimming as much as I am now. Going to Indy made me love the sport even more than I already did!! MOST of the athletes are so down to earth and so willing to take time for their fans! I wont go into every detail about it because most of the people reading this already know every detail about it. LOL Lets just say it is a small world and so much happened that I will never forget for as long as I live!

A new chapter in my life is working while going to school. I have never worked while going to school and it is a new challenge in my life to try to manage my time, but I am really enjoying my job. I am a cashier at my favorite store TARGET! It is obviously not my dream job, but it is a great for making a little extra money for various trips that I plan on taking this summer! School is dwindling down. ONE SEMESTER LEFT!!!!! I have made some great friends this semester and am really enjoying my classes! As for what I am doing after graduation. I have a few options. I want to go explore what else is out there. I have seen what is out there and I want to experience it. Right now I am thinking Denver might be my top pick. My friend Laura lives out there and she is looking for a roommate. I am thinking about at least trying it out for the summer. If I don't like it I can always find somewhere else to go! I just want to have fun in life!!!

Ok bloggers! I am off for now! I will try to update again soon!!

Things on My Mind

Wow it has been quite a while since I have posted a blog.  I wanted to try and do this on a weekly even daily basis, but obviously life has caught up with me and that did not happen.  Things in my life lately  have been pretty crazy.  School has started and the homework has set in.  For the past week not a day has gone by that I have not had to do a lesson plan, but I guess that is something I am going to have to deal with if I am going to be a teacher.  LOL   

Not only has school been on my mind, but also all this hype about Michael Phelps. For those of you reading who don't know...  I am a HUGE Michael Phelps fan.  I have been since the Athens games.  Lately Michael has been in the media for a photo that has surfaced from a private party he attend 3 months ago.  I have to say that over the past week I have been very upset.  Not by the actions of Phelps, but by the actions of the media.(keep reading I will get into my feelings about the actual pic)  Is this really the most important story in the country right now? I think not!!!   Did we not just get a new President!! HELL YES WE DID!!! THANK GOODNESS!!!!  Lets focus on the more important things in life like the economy and how Obama is going to clean up the mess that Bush left him with.  Like I said before the picture was taken at a PRIVATE party and it should have stayed private.  It makes me sick that a friend would do this to him.  Like he has said in many interviews over the past week... "this week I have learned who my true friends and family are."  A true friend wouldn't sell out a friend like that.  What is the world coming to?  People care about two things these days 1. MONEY 2. THEMSELVES.  

Ok now onto the actual picture.   Maybe it is the 23 year old college student in me but I am not disappointed in his actions.  He has trained every single day for the majority of his life.   His life has consisted of eating swimming for the most part.  He has not had the opportunity to live his life and explore.  He takes 6 months off after accomplishing something that no one in the world as EVER done.  Mike is the only one who can say that he has won 8... count them 8!... gold medals in 1 olympics.  He himself won more gold medals than some COUNTRIES!! HOLY SHIT!  If that isn't something to be proud of then I don't know what is! So we praise him and raise him because of all his accomplishments and as quick as we do that we bring him back down.  We are all human... NEWS FLASH... Human's make mistakes.  He smoked a little pot.  Yes, it is illegal, but so is underage drinking, downloading free music, speeding,  jay walking, the list could go on.  EVERYONE and I mean EVERYONE on Earth has broken they law sometime or another.  Yes, some are more extreme than others, but it is still breaking the law.  Leave the kid alone... let me see you train for 12 years of your life and see how you react when you finally get a break.   

Onto the three month suspension.  I don't think that it is all bad.  They are treating Michael like he is a human who made a mistake and there are consequences that he has to face just like anyone else.  I feel that Michael is taking this in a very mature fashion.  He has admitted that indeed it was him in the picture, and he has taken the suspension and accepted the consequences of his actions.  Had the suspension been much longer I may have felt differently (maybe that is because of the fact that Nationals are in July and I have my tickets and am ready to go!).  I feel that all this negativity is just going to fuel him more and make him that much more ready to kick some ass at Nationals!! 

Sorry this got so long.  I have had all this built up inside me this week and I needed to get it out!! Hopefully I will post again soon! 

Day 3

Well today I have kind of been on an emotional roller coaster.  It was my last day of work before going back to school.  Most people would be extremely excited about this, but not me.  I am going to miss my "kids" terribly.  Over the past year I have grown so attached to those little guys, even though they make me want to pull my hair out sometimes.  I know I will be back to visit, but I don't know if I will come back to work full time like I was.  I have been off and on at this job for 4 years and I am so going to miss it.  I am not only going to miss the kids but also the women I work with.  For the most part we all get along so well and I am truly going to miss seeing them everyday! I told my boss I will fill in whenever she wants me to and I know I will be getting calls!! So I did not say goodbye I just said I will see you later!! I am going to miss walking into work every morning and hear all my "kids" call me  "Mama Nikki" as I became known!!  For some of the kids that are there day in and day out you really do feel like you are their parents. It is like I am a mother leaving her 60 children behind.  But it is time to move on with my life and finish my degree!! :)   

 

Master Cleanse day three has been tough! While I was at work it was fine I was not tempted to eat one bit and I just stuck to my drink.  When I got home, now that is a totally different story.  I think I just need to kick my little brother out of the house while I am doing this because he is the cause of all my temptation and boy does he love to rub it in that I can't eat.  But what are little brothers for right?  Well tonight he wanted to order pizza and eat a bunch of junk food while he and my Dad watched the Florida-Oklahoma game.  The smell of the pizza, the shrimp mom was making, and the bbq chicken wings in the oven was too much too handle, so I got my coat on and went to a friends house to get away from the temptation.  The whole time I was in the house I kept saying to my family I really want food, I want it really bad, but I stayed strong and ate nothing.  When I came home the smell was still lingering in the house and I still wanted food, but with a little help from my Mom I re-convinced myself that I can do this and made myself a drink.  This time I thought I would get a little creative and I made it with ice and put it in the blender.  YUM!!! I used a spoon and it was actually like I was eating!! LOL It made me feel so much better!!!   I know now that with my strength and the support of my family that I can do this!!! 

Sorry for the typos

Just wanted to say sorry for the typos in the last blog I was on my phone and did not read through it!

Day 2

Today was nonstop craziness for me as I am trying to find a new apartment for when school starts. Talk about stressful. I saw a few nice ones but mostly they were dumps. Two of them looked like a crack house although I don't know what that would look like but I am sure this apartment was close. I did look at one that I really really liked but it was a house and was rather expensive. I never really thought about a house before cause I know it comes with a lot of eraonsibility but I really like the idea now and the landlord was very nice. As we continued our day we ran into the landlord 3 times. Taylor and I thought that it was a sign that I needed to get the house but Dad being the one footing the bill he gets the last say and he was not with us.
As for the master cleanse today has gone great. Tons better than yesterday. I woke up not feeling hungry although I am hungry now but that could also be the smell of subway in the car once again thanks to that brother of mine. Why do I do anywhere with him he just temps me. Well his tempting is not working I have stayed strong and have not had anything to eat. I am feeling really good about this now and thinking that I can get through this. I know if I do I will have great results.

Day One

Today was day numero uno on my Master Cleanse.  Let me tell you I was dreading it.  This morning before taking my first drink of my lemonade mix I took a deep breathe not know what to expect.   To my surprise it was not that bad.  I thought to myself I can handle this.  Then I went to drink the second glass from a batch that I had mixed for the whole day.  This one not so good, the red pepper burned that back of my throat so bad, and I could see the pepper floating in there which did not help things at all.  I did my best to drink most of it but was not successful at drinking it all gone.  My third one I tried and it was even worse and being at work I was not able to mix a new batch so I decided to stick with regular water for the rest of the day.  Tomorrow I am going to cut down on the red pepper and gradually add more as the cleanse progresses.  I think today God was testing me to see if I could actually do this.... it was a day surrounded with some of my favorite foods.  To my surprise I stayed away from them did not take one bite! It was so hard to order a water while I watch my little brother snarf down a triple stacker from Burger King with the smell permeating through the car.  I held my ground did not eat ANYTHING!!  It was tough but I did it!!!   

I keep going into spurts of doubting myself.  I know I shouldn't do this.  I know that I am hard headed enough that if I want to do something badly enough I will do it.  So I have these spurts of doubt and get down on myself and then I tell myself this is nothing.  That this will benefit me and that it is only 10 days of my life.  If I can't do this for ten days then what can I do?   I mean is this really that hard?  Ok so it is but it is not like I am preforming brain surgery.  Tomorrow is going to be a better day for me.  I am going to get in all of my Master Cleanse drink that I am supposed to and I will be day two down!!! They say the first three days are the hardest after that it gets easier.  I am just going to do my best to plow through these first 3 days and half way through tomorrow I will be halfway there!!! 

First Blog EVER!!!

Ok so this is the first time I have ever blogged.  We will see how this goes and how well I keep up with it.  The reason I decided to start this blog was because I am starting to live my life differently.  Tomorrow at 8:30 AM (well actually by now it is today) I will be starting the Master Cleanse.  I am changing the way I am living and this is step number one!   I am very determined to do this, but after just getting done mixing up a batch of the drink..... I'm not too sure about it.  I am going to give it my best shot, and I know I should not doubt myself at all because if I do it will only make things worse, but looking at it I just couldn't help it.  I am starting strong though all out no turning back I can do this I know I can... this is the change I need in my life.  I want to live a long healthy life and right now the healthy part is not happening.  I wasn't doing too bad until the holidays came.  All the family and good food.... man it does bad things to your body.  LOL  SO now it is time for a change... a MAJOR CHANGE.  To me this is not just a diet, but it is a lifestyle change.  This Master Cleanse is going to be the starting off point and the rest will follow....